Abraham Lincoln was the first war president to write personal letters of condolence to families of service members killed in action, whether the deaths came from hostile fire, disease or were accidental. Since the Clinton administration, an unwritten policy has existed that letters are not sent to families of service members who took their own lives. The rationale behind the policy, passed from one administration to the next via White House protocol officers, is not clear. Military and administration officials have said that they believe it originated in the view that “suicide in the military is not an honorable way to die.”

The lack of condolence letters from President Barack Obama to the families has become a public issue with mounting criticism of the policy. The United States is fighting wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and military suicides have continued on the battlefronts and among veterans who have returned home from single or multiple deployments. The president changed the policy of not allowing pictures of flag-draped caskets returning to Dover Air Force Base in Delaware if the families wanted news coverage. Now, White House spokesman Tommy Vietor has announced that

they are reviewing the “inherited” policy of families of suicides not receiving condolence letters from the president.

There are significant underlying questions to be answered: What is the incidence of suicidal deaths in the military and what are the causes? How are their deaths acknowledged to their families at present? What is the current level of attention given to mental problems and post-traumatic stress disorder overseas and at home? And most fundamental: Is the rationale that “military suicide is not an honorable way to die” a valid judgment?

On January 31 of 2009, Army officials reported that suicides among soldiers had reached the highest level in nearly three decades. In 2008, “at least 128 soldiers” killed themselves, surpassing the civilian rate for the first time since the Vietnam War. The number included soldiers in the Army Reserve and National Guard as well as the regular Army. Investigations into 15 additional deaths raised the final number to 140. General Peter Chiarelli, who is leading suicide prevention efforts, said at the time, “We need to move quickly to do everything we can to reverse the very disturbing number of suicides we have in the U.S. Army.” Through October of 2009, the Army reported 133 suicides among active duty soldiers, on a pace to surpass last year’s number of 140. The Marine Corps is also likely to surpass last year’s 42 suicides.

Army officials said that 15-month deployments to war zones contributed to the increase, allowing for only brief times away from the battlefields. They listed basic causes as: post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, alcohol abuse, family and financial problems. Thirty percent of the suicides in the preceding four years took place during a deployment. Thirty-five percent took place after a deployment. Thirty-five percent had never been deployed. The Army said they had hired more general practitioners, often the first health care providers to come in contact with soldiers in distress, and 250 more mental health providers. This number seems inadequate compared to the hundreds of thousands of men and women now serving in the U.S. military. The recent tragic case of a psychiatrist going on a killing rampage at Fort Hood has renewed the focus on mental illness in the service.

When the Army report was released, Paul Rieckhoff, the executive director of Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America, said, “The suicide numbers come as no surprise to veterans who have experienced firsthand the psychological toll of war. Since the Iraq war began, suicide rates and other signs of psychological injury, like marital strain and substance abuse, have been increasing every year.”

Funerals of military suicides include the traditional seven rifles firing 3 times for the 2- gun salute. The family receives the folded American flag, a letter from the Army praising their son, and financial death benefits. However, the lack of a letter of condolence from the president has loomed large for many. Kim Ruocco, whose Marine husband committed suicide in 2005 after service in Iraq, is the director for suicide support for TAPS, the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. She said, “These families already feel such shame and feel so alienated from the military and the country, a letter from the president might give them some comfort, some sense that people recognize their sacrifice.” She also added that the Gold Stars awarded are slightly different and some families have not received the folded flags.

When Kim Ruocco spoke of feelings of shame and alienation, she had hit on the crux of how suicide has been long viewed as a stigma in our society with religious, philosophical and legal underpinnings. As we learn more about the longlasting stresses of war and the toll taken on brave men and women who have volunteered to serve their country, we need to re-evaluate making a moral judgment on what is “an honorable way to die.” The dead and their families have given their ultimate gift to the nation and there should not be a slight attached to that sacrifice.

Gregg Keesling, whose son Army Specialist Chancellor Keeling “died by suicide” on June l9 during a third deployment in Iraq, wrote to President Obama and the Army Chief of Staff. “We hope the President of the United States would want to show the appreciation to a family like ours for the sacrifice we made in allowing our son to become a soldier and defend his country.”

Joyce S. Anderson is the author of “Courage in High Heels,” “Flaw in the Tapestry,” “If Winter Comes” and “The Mermaids Singing.” She can be reached at JSAWrite@aol.com.